Sometimes the dumb stuff I post on Twitter, Facebook and various other social networking sites become ideas that end up in songs.

For example, the song Caffeinated, from my album “The Man Who Broke His Own Heart”, was based on this blog written and published on the Man Bites God website very early on a Monday morning way back in 2005.

And here it is:

“It’s about 3.45am. We spent the night having pizza and a band meeting where we got a lot done. We talked about gigs and rehearsed some songs. And I drank a lot of coffee and ate some chocolate, so when everyone else went home at about 1am I couldn’t go to sleep.

I sat in front of the computer, looking blankly at the screen for about half an hour. Then I turned the computer on. More staring. Then I wrote a song that contained the line “clergical procedure” and I laughed so hard I fell off my chair. When I was on the floor I forgot where I was or what I was doing and the carpet man who seemed to simultaneously appear and yet had always been there, told me that the other carpet men needed me to spill more food on the carpet because that’s how carpet men eat. And when I asked him where the carpet women were and how they procreated as a fibrous/molecular entity without a female species he just laughed and held up a mirror and I realized I was John Denver.

At this moment the chicken wings I had been heating up in the microwave flew out of the kitchen and politely informed me I didn’t have a microwave and that I had been trying to warm them in a dish of doll water (made by placing a doll in a blender and then adding sugar and dividing the whole thing by 7) They also told me they were able to tell me about my absence of microwave because they all recently purchased lips on ebay. Then they flew off before the carpet men could spear them and drag them below the surface.

Meanwhile several sleepy bored people were knocking on my door demanding to speak to my mormons, and my house had become a vapour cloud and I couldn’t find a jar to keep the vapour cloud in because even my jars were part of a vapour cloud and I didn’t want to make John Denver look stupid by attempting to insert a large vapour cloud into a small portion of vapour cloud. Then Buddha appeared before me and corrected my posture, and I could only speak in alphabetical order and no one was there, including me, and I woke up… and it had all been a reality.

I guess I was just a little sleep deprived.”

The song Caffeinated and the album, The Man Who Broke His Own Heart, are available HERE on CD and MP3.